Hmm~

Is it normal for me to fall in love again? I don't want people call it as *took someone for granted* because I'm not. Suddenly I cried, I removed him from my facebook account, I want to stay away from his life because I know someday it'll be hurt. This just the begining of love journey and I know complicated relationship and unmature relationship is waiting for me out there :( Jourdan, I do love you and I can't explain when was it come. Seriously I want you to be my man but it's totally rubbish! sigh. You are the first man that know how to make me smile, laugh again and believe there is love for me. You're an angel that God sent to this world to light up everybody's life. You're so special in your own way Jourdan.

I'd lied to you :( actually I don't have any child in my life. That Griffin I had told you is my favourite nephew (Son of my brother) I lied because I don't want you to have any feelings towards me. I lied because I care for your heart. I lied because I believe someday you'll find other beautiful girl who can love you for who you are. I do love you but I can't have you in my life. (I don't know why I'm saying this) Sorry If I make you angry, dissapointed and what ever feelings you had on that day.

I never try to get over you, I cried myself to sleep everyday, I won't take you as my rebound of the past relationship. I've told you from the start, I just want to give my heart a break but why you forced yourself to get me? :( Now you did, you left a big scar in me without any cure.

Met an old friend

For a very long time, God gave us a chance to meet again :) It was happened yesterday, I met my old friend, Maryana David. She introduced me to her beloved husband Mr John Baul (kinda perfect couple) I saw their intimacy and those making me jealous with that relationship. I hope someday I can feel that intimacy too (I mean with my husband) haha. By the way, I keep thinking of someone who made me smile whole day when we go for skype. How I missed him within these few days :'( I wonder if he still mad at me or not. My mistake! I told him not to find me or call me anymore now all I can say is REGRETED never ends. Like he said before THIS GUY TOO ADORABLE TO KEEP ISN'T IT? Yea, you're right. Once I told myself not to fall in love with you, once you told me not to steal your heart but now it's happening! Every love words I sent to him is totally true and I hate it when I can't handle it by myself :( what a failed!

p/s In the picture~ Mariana Naling and Maryana David

When I close my eyes I think of you
And the times we've had been through 
Even though we're far apart right now
I remember back when you were here with me
How you've made my world complete
But now I'm left alone
We talked about love and hope
Wishing we could start a life our own
I wish that I could live without you
 Why did you tear my heart apart
You said you'd love me from the start
All those painful things you've put me through
But I'm still loving you
I've tried to give my best to you
I don't deserve the things you do
Everything has gone to memories
I just wish I knew the truth behind the lies.

p/s its been a week since we're breaking up this relationship n i still cant get over you :')

Don't Be That Girl

Honestly, don't be that girl. That girl who goes back continuously and thinks that every time will be different. I understand you miss him, and its easier to breathe with him around. But isn't it easier to smile when he's not breaking up with you, or getting mad at you for nothing? You don't deserve to be the back up. That person he drops and picks up whenever he feels like. Don't be that girl. That girl who thinks that each time he comes around he means what he says and won't leave again, everyone knows he will. And you end up looking like a fool in the end.. again. I get that you're happier when he is texting you and cuddling with you. But aren't you happier when you aren't crying on your floor because he hasn't said a word to you all day? No one can tell you who to be. But don't be that girl. You're smarter than that girl. Stronger than that girl. And worth a hell of a lot more than that girl.

p/s My NandakGedut

Suddenly

Suddenly, you came into my world.
Suddenly, I liked you.
Suddenly, you became the greatest gift of all.

Suddenly, I fell in love with you.
Suddenly, seeing you everyday became my daily routine.
Suddenly, I need you more and more.
Suddenly, you were my everything.
Suddenly, I have so much memories with you.
Suddenly, you were irreplaceable.
Suddenly, I depended on you.
Suddenly, you meant the world to me.
Suddenly, I can't do anything without you.
Suddenly, you became an important part of my life.
Suddenly, I took you for granted.
Suddenly, you stop trying for me.
Suddenly, my world fell apart.
Suddenly, you gave me despair.
Suddenly, I feel lost without you.
Suddenly, you left me, just like that.
Suddenly, it's over.
Suddenly, I would do anything to get you back.
Suddenly, you gave me hope.
Suddenly, I was forsaken.
Suddenly, you became a memory.
Suddenly, I can't face reality.
Suddenly, you seemed like a stranger.
Suddenly, I cried.
Suddenly, you didn't care.
Suddenly, I lost all hopes.
Suddenly, you are gone.

Forever.

p/s My Gedut

All This Time

Cry.. All i can do is crying. I never meant to let you go but u forced me to do so. Seriously Im hurt *a lot because cant always let u go. I dont know why u keep playing the same record. Saya tak nak lagi menyusahkan kamu, yes! saya memang cepat cari pengganti bukan sebab rebound my past tapi saya nak buktikan kat awak yang saya dah pun jumpa yang terbaik dari awak.. Kalau dulu awak tidak pernah faham apa yang saya rasa, nanti awak akan rasa sebab sekarang awak mungkin ketawa.. Everytime I entered this blog room feels like you're still here with me. But it just a dream that I should wake up to reality..

Hai :P

Heeeyyyaaaahhh!!Pororo da??! lama xupdate blog nie ;) how was it?haha,,facebook makin boring -.- nahhh sekarang beralih pula ke blog.. Wahhh,baru tadi dapat add lagu dalam blog,canggih tak? -.- orang dari dulu dah add,,hahaha.. Anyway,esok sekolah..just dropped myself here by saying 'Hi I'm back ^^v ' esok lusa adala topik..sekarang mata dah ngantok sangat..nak tido lagi lepas nie :) gunite blogie